There comes a point in every functional relationship when moving in together seems like the next logical step. If that is the case with you and your girlfriend, congratulations! You can say goodbye to your man cave and welcome all the girly trinkets that your girlfriend will bring along with her beautiful presence.
Scared yet? If not, you should really know that moving in together can be scary as hell. I should know – been there, done that. On the other hand, it can be a completely blissful and exciting experience. That is, of course, if both of you know what you’re getting into and are prepared for a whole lot of effort.
If moving in together is not a decision either of you has taken lightly, your life under one roof should be pretty fun. Otherwise, you’re in for a rollercoaster ride of unexpected surprises. Nevertheless, this survival guide should help you take that huge step further in your relationship and help you turn the whole situation into something absolutely perfect that will make your relationship stronger.
Respect Each Other’s Personal Space
One of the best parts of moving in together is that you get to see each other whenever you want to. However, you shouldn’t be one of those couples that spend every single minute of every single day glued together, because that will definitely become boring after a while and all of the passion that holds you together now will eventually burn out.
Spending entire days together and going out together can be fun and exciting, but you should give each other some space from time to time. Go out for a beer with your friends and encourage her to do the same. If she wishes to stay at home and enjoy a good book while you’re not there, that’s fine, too. What’s important is for both of you to spend some quality time apart sometimes and respect each other’s wishes on how you’re going to spend that time.
Talk about Everything
Relationships work both ways. If only one of you is trying to make it work, your relationship is already doomed. Both of you need to be patient and tolerant. It can’t be all about you, because there’s one more person on the team now to think about.
If there’s anything that may be bothering you, talk it out. If either one of you two is bottling things up, doom and pestilence will befall your home. I’m not kidding – it can be disastrous. Therefore, take my advice and talk. Compromise is key and you can accomplish anything by openly sharing your thoughts and opinions with each other.
Don’t Stop Going Out on Dates
Just because you’re together almost all the time doesn’t mean that you should stop going out together – just the two of you. Keep planning romantic dates – dinners at your favourite restaurant, lunches, drinks at a bar, movies – you name it.
It’s important to keep your love flame burning and dates can help you do just that. I know it’s absolutely great staying in the comfort of your home, while binge-watching your favourite Netflix show and eating pizza but, seriously, get off your comfy couch and go out on a real date from time to time. You’ll thank me later.
Don’t Nag Each Other
If you are a rare unicorn of a male specimen who tends to nag all the time, just stop it. No one likes it. Your girlfriend may love you to the moon and back, but even she won’t tolerate constant nagging. You need to respect each other, because that is the most important thing in every healthy relationship.
If you’re always waiting for her for hours to get ready before going out, don’t be irritated by that. That’s just us girls; we need time, and a lot of it, to be ready to leave the house. If you’re cool about it, she’ll love you even more, even if she secretly knows that it’s taking everything you’ve got not to burst into flames.
On the other hand, if your girlfriend is the nagging type, just breathe and let her get it out of her system. We can be tough to handle sometimes but, admit it, you love us more for it (wink, wink). Seriously, if she nags about you not putting down the toilet seat or not using the coasters, you should just listen to her and every problem will be solved. It’s that easy. If you feel she’s being unreasonable about something, again, talk it out. Communication is everything and it can strengthen every bond the two of you have.
Work Out Your Finances
Now, for some real talk. Having an honest talk with your girlfriend about money can be awkward, especially if the two of you are not usually open about finances. However, this is maybe the most important talk you can have, because you have to work out how you are going to pay the bills and not end up struggling to pay the rent.
While living a single life may include spending all of your money on the newest video game, sharing a roof with your girlfriend means that you need to think about some other (more important – sorry, no hard feelings) stuff. But, hey, if your girlfriend is a passionate gamer, too, I’m sure you can work something out. I can definitely relate, so believe me when I tell you, it can be done.
Joking aside, you should really start thinking seriously about your finances and maybe even start saving some money. You can easily put aside a part of each paycheck if you switch to a few cheaper options when buying household items and make a couple of sacrifices when it comes to luxuries. I’m telling you this because it worked out perfectly for my boyfriend and me and helped us not to strangle each other when we first started living together.
So, when you’re ready for the finance talk, do some research, put things on paper and make sure you have a well-thought out financial plan going.
If you and your girlfriend are thinking about moving in together for the first time, think really hard about it. You need to be absolutely sure that is what both of you want and you’re ready to take a huge leap of faith. If it doesn’t work out, at least you’ll know where you stand. If it does, then you’re in for a wonderful world of love and happiness. I wish you all the luck in the world and, remember, love truly does conquer all.